The kitchen is closed and the lessons have all been taught.

The trays are stacked and cleaned and soon the freezer will be emptied and turned off. My first year as manager has come to a close. I must admit that the transition from part time to full time was a lot harder than I expected.

At times I felt like I simply couldn't do all that needed to be done. The funny thing about summer break is it always comes just when you need it.

Here's a few things I learned this year.

Kindergartners are simply my all time favorite. There's been much talk in my district about returning to half day kindergarten and I truly hope they do not. First and foremost, I think this would be a HUGE step backwards and not in the best interest for our district. But the second reason is simply selfish. I would miss those little buggers in the lunch line. Who would ask me for baby grapes (blueberries)? Who would tell me the white broccoli is the bestest? Who would eat the bananas without peeling them?

Lunch participation is a hard thing to predict. I'd like to figure out why my free kids aren't eating. I'd like to figure out why some kids come to breakfast and others don't. I'd like to increase participation. I'd like to make sure the kids that are hungry are getting enough to eat. I'd like to figure out how to do that.

Ordering food isn't as intimidating as I thought it would be. When I first had to do the ordering, I thought I'd never get it down. But as the year progressed, I got a little better at it. Sure, I forgot to order pickles and I sometimes had way too much pineapple but it all worked out.

It's best to be over prepared. I planned for about 300 people at VIP breakfast even though only about 55 RSVP'd. That turned out to be a pretty good estimate. Apparently RSVPing isn't all that fashionable.

Most days, I love my job. Since accepting my position as kitchen manager, I've been offered two other jobs, both which paid significantly more. Turns out, I truly like what I do. Sure, some might not think it all that important. Some might think it beneath them. But in the long run, it only matters what I think. And I think that doing something you feel passionately about makes a difference.

And isn't making a difference what life is all about?

Less than 20 lunches need to be prepared before summer break is upon us. I have to say that it has been a bigger adjustment than Inexpected going from part time to full time but I have no regrets.

Here's what we learned this week.

Apple crisp: No one wants the apple crisp until you run out. I'm pretty sure there is some kind of law of supply and demand related to this very notion.

It's easy to piss off the bank. You'd think that people who have hours like 9 a.m. until 4 p.m. would be super pleasant. My deposit from grandparent's day had A LOT of coins in it. I separated them all into little ziplock bags and wrote on the bag how much was included but I didn't have any rolls. Guess what came back in my bank bag. Tons of rolls and a note about being required to roll all coins. Who are they trying to kid? I know they have a coin counter. I've been to the bank before.

Kids will notice. Sometimes it feels like kids could care less about school lunch and they'll only notice the negative. But this week when I took the time to make kiwi/orange/blueberry cups just about everyone of those little buggers noticed and were super excited about.

Refried beans still get a reaction. No matter how many times we serve them, we still get a few gasps from the littlest customers who definately judge their food by its appearence. Foods that looks like poop is a hard sale on a K-3 level.

Excited about changes and ideas for next year. If the goal is to continue to improve service and provide healthy meals then we are headed in the right direction.

What did you learn this week?

It's been awhile since I've shared some cafeteria adventures. I was feeling a little burned out from blogging but I'm ready to make a comeback.

Here's hoping that a few of you are still reading and that maybe you'll bring a friend or two with you.

Being a superhero is pretty darn cool. May 3rd was School Lunch Superhero day and we were treated to some really cool cafeteria decorations, thank you notes and even a dance number. My favorite were the notes depicting my hairnet.

Sunflowers are my favorite. The preschool class gave me a sunflower they planted from a seed and told me "Happy Mudder's Day". It may have been the single cutest thing that happened to me this week.

Old people make me laugh. While serving lunch to a ton of grandparents this week, I was asking if they'd like milk or water. One grandpap asked "Got any beer back there?"

Vanilla milk takes down chocolate. Can you believe that there is a milk flavor that can take down chocolate as the champion?? Turns out my kiddos are in love with vanilla milk. It sort of tastes like melted vanilla ice cream. I'm still shocked that so may of my students love this milk.

"I don't wike the wed things." I don't know how you feel about red peppers but I think they are delicious. The students, on the other hand, are not all that fond. They are totally convinced that they are spicy. Now they've started asking me to take put all the "wed" ones.

They don't know what's good!

What have you learned while I was gone??

This week we had a snow day that was really a rain day, we served green eggs, we wore chef hats and we learned what makes a day awesome and what doesn't. Here's what I learned.

I do not like them Sam I am; I do not like green eggs and ham. I had a lot of fun attempting to color the scrabbled eggs on Monday. We had shades from shamrock shake to Oscar the grouch. Turns out if you mix the shamrock with the grouch you get a more authentic green. Who knew?

It is not the greatest day ever! When an entire second grade class squeezed into the elevator because a student with an injury couldn't take the stairs one little boy exclaimed "this is the greatest day ever" to which the teacher replied "one of our classmates has a disability. This is NOT the greatest day ever. "

Hello, I'm Janet. From the Department of Agriculture. AYFKM? Apparently a quick glance into the dry storage and the cold storage was all she needed to see. She was also very interested if I had prominately displayed my federally required poster indicating that all students are welcome no matter their race or economic status. The entire visit lasted less than 10 minutes.

Middle of the week snow day. The blizzard of 2013 turned into a mostly annoying rainstorm. The worst part about having a day off in the middle of the week is that Thursday starts to feel like Monday.

National school Breakfast week can be fun. We had a lot of new faces at breakfast this week and that's always exciting. What I learned from that is if you offer a prize, they will come.

What did you learn this week?

This week the kitchen was full of laughter and a few AYFKM moments.

Here's what I learned.

Wholy Cwrap! That's alot of milk. Yesterday I ran out of chocolate milk and when a first grader saw the milkman there at breakfast this morning he asked me if he brought the chocolate milk. I said "oh, he sure did" and then the little guy asked me how many. "This week he only brought about 650." He responded with a heartfelt "wholy cwrap." I don't even serve it a breakfast and we are the smallest school in the district. It really isn't all that much but I suppose its all about perspective.

Heart shaped egg patties and toast: I had a valentine themed breakfast on Thursday complete with matching napkins. Too bad it was our lowest count of the week. It was freakin cute.

Have you seen my bowl? It's possible that when someone is frantically search through the snacks and looking for their bowl that they really are just looking for a soup bowl. Who knew?

Valentine's Day can bring out the awkward. Whether that be kindness misinterpreted as something more or a big punch in the face on the playground. It really is just another Thursday.

Can you grab me the salt? Um is it appropriate to ask the very pregnant teacher to fetch you the salt so you don't have to get up. I'm leaning towards no.

What did you learn this week?

This week in the cafeteria, we served one day of hot lunch.  As stated in my post last week, I was told to brace for Hurricane Sandy and be prepared for a possible early release on Monday. 

Well school on Monday never materialized. 

School on Tuesday also didn't happen

We had a two hour delay on Wednesday which cancelled breakfast.

Thursday and Friday were previously scheduled teacher work days so we had school for approximately five hours.  Of which, my son, proudly announced that he watched Pippi Longstocking.  It is an excellent movie...

Here's what I learned one the only day we served lunch this week.

Only those over the age of 10 like black bean salsa.  When I mix black beans with salsa and corn the adults come a running.  Add some rice and put taco salad on the menu and you'll get some takers.  The kids...not so much.

Walk Away Tacos is a culturally diverse meal.  Me taking temps:  Rice - Mexican 167 degrees; Beans - Black - 145; Turkey - taco - 160;  bahahahaha  For some reason it made me laugh.  Maybe you had to be there.

Stupid can use a photocopier:  My co-worker was given a pamphlet at the Halloween Parade containing multiple versus of scripture and indicating that her mere presence there was proof she was going to hell.  Um...it's a parade.  It's not genocide?  It's not sacrifical offerings.  It's firetrucks and candy. 

Halloween is not a good day to have school.  There are days when kids get excited.  Right before Christmas Break.  The first snow fall.  Every freaking full moon.  Nothing compares to Halloween after having two weather emergency days.  WOW.

Seashell pasta and meatballs  Seems this meal is our lowest count and it might be on the chopping block.  What is your kids favorite school lunch meal?  Did you like school pasta when you were a kid?

What did you learn this week?

I'm convinced there was a full moon this week as we had a lot of significantly strange behavior and it's not snowing yet.

Here's what I learned.

Fire safety week. Nothing screams fire safety week like little kids proudly announcing to you that they know what to do if they catch on fire. "Stop, drop and wool. Thas what you need to do."

Sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name. Sometimes I take breakfast to teachers. Sometimes I drop off pudding cups with cookies and cream whipped topping to someone I know might need a little pick me up. It never fails to make me smile when, like Norm from cheers, all the kids stop what they're doing to say my name. "Hello, Miss Wendy"

I've got a feeling. In a super odd move this week, I just got done saying that I thought it odd we had not seen the state inspector yet and within five minutes of my statement he was in the kitchen. All remains well in the cafeteria although I may have to have some service on the dishwasher. This is sort of a bonus as the dishwasher repairman is quite pleasant to look at.

Bampire bumpkins are hard to make. I'm usually pretty good at deciphering kid-speak, but when a first grader told his teacher he was making a bampire bumpkin it took me quite a while to figure out just what his Jack-o-lantern was going to look like.

Breakfast for lunch. Kids love pancakes and sausage. It continues to be our most popular meal with the least amount of alternates. It out scores pizza and that's saying a lot.

I also learned that I'm gonna miss having one of my own kids in the building. Here we are embarrassing my son with a birthday basket.

What did you learn this week?

Holy Crap!  I learned a lot this week and I only worked three days!  Imagine the wealth of knowledge I would be able to share with you if I actually worked five days!

Go get the alcohol.  Clearly this means something totally different to me than it does to my boss.  She meant the alcohol wipes we use to clean our thermometers.  I thought she had a secret stash I wasn't aware of.

If you're in your 90s chances are you won't die of congenital heart failure.  Ever have one of those words that just doesn't sound right.  I was trying to relay how my grandma's brother passed away and when I said congenital it sounded so wrong.  My co-workers laughed and corrected me.  They said congestive.  They mocked me most of the day about my congenitals, but I was still convinced that it was a real word.  Those to just wouldn't be swayed until our Dr. Principal concurred.  She must feel like a genius when she eats with us.

Kids have no idea what chili is.  We had chili this week and a lot of our kids were thrown for a loop.  One exceptionally articulate kindergartner nearly started to cry, insisting that he didn't order soup that he ordered hot lunch.  When I offered to (gasp) change his lunch to PB&J or a turkey sandwich his response, "I do so like turkey sandwiches."

Keep the hot water in the pan.  I managed to spill very hot water down the front of my pants.  It involved pulling slotted pans from a steamer and not realizing just how much water was still in there.  This incident prompted two things: an immediate visit to the bathroom to apply burn cream and the idea for a line of injured-at-work greeting cards.  "Heard you got all hot and bothered at work this week."

Everyone looks the same from behind.  Ok...not everyone.  We were all sitting down to lunch when a teacher from another building hollered to us, "Have you seen Dr. Principal?".  Um...no...oh wait.  She's just sitting right here beside me.  The teacher's response, "Oh, I didn't realize.  You look just like everyone else, I mean, well, not that, um...can I talk to you for a minute." 

Wait...are you saying lunch ladies look a certain way?





Say no to crack.  The last thing I learned this week was be careful just how low the rise of your pants falls.  There is a lot of bending in this job and your co-workers might not want to see your ass crack. 

This last one sort of proves that there is a certain look to lunch ladies, doesn't it?

What did you learn this week?

This week in the cafeteria I learned:

The bananas will get ripe when the bananas get ripe. I attempted to speed up the ripening process by lying the bananas out on trays and leaving them in the light. My sub told me God would make them ripe when he wanted them to be ripe. While I have no doubt the God grows bananas, I feel confident that he has other more pressing things to worry about. Perhaps we should open canned pineapple.

We are talking about thermometers, right? Conversation overheard: I didn't know you needed to clean it before you stuck it in and after you took it out. Umm yes. You need to clean the thermometer before and after testing. What did you think they were talking about?

Administrators in the kitchen. I've talked before about our awesome principal and how often she hangs out with us. This week we got to work with the district's business manager in his attempt to learn how everyone contributes to the school district. I learned that elementary kids will be angels when there's a man serving the beans.

Passwords, production papers and other random thoughts. If you are going to take the day off please tell your staff the computer password or they might have tech change it to WendyisAwesome and not tell you. Production papers should be entitled production papers not menus. I am starting to wonder if I am going to be able to find anything on my boss's computer next year.

Kids are like parrots. If you call your dog bastard at home it's a pretty safe bet that your child just might say that at school. You might want to reconsider. I hear Benji's a good name for a dog.

In conclusion, I learned to think outside the box when dealing with the elderly and their computers, I refrained from calling anyone a bastard, I kept the thermometers thoroughly clean, I prayed over green bananas and I taught someone who makes just a little bit more money than I do how to work the dishwasher.

What did you learn this week?

This week we had the kitchen open for four of the five days. School was closed today in observation of Good Friday.

Here's what I learned...

Applesauce is a fruit. A kindergartener asked me with total sincerity if the applesauce he was holding was a fruit. "It's made with apples," I replied. "I know, but is it a fruit?". "Um...yes."

Dear Michelle, we are trying but we ain't quite there. As I walked around breakfast this week I noticed only four kids with white milk. The rest either had strawberry or chocolate. There is something utterly repulsive about Fruit Loops floating in strawberry milk or Rice Krispies bathed in chocolate. How do I get the kids to buy breakfast without offering flavored milk?

Autism Awareness. This week a group of kindergarteners visited barring gifts. Magnets supporting autism awareness. Since we have a autistic class in the building, it is very important that all the kiddos in our building understand the things that make us all unique. My magnet had a paper attached that said 1 out of 88 kids will be diagnosed with autism. That's staggering.

A hotdog and 2 oz of fruit. Does that sound like lunch? According to the National School Lunch Program it is. It has three elements--a protein, a grain and a fruit. Personally, I couldn't be happier that the regulations change next year to include at least one more element.

Again, I encourage you all to ask your child what they were offered vs. what they chose. You will probably be surprised.

Easter Egg hunts gross me out. Let me explain...no there is too much...let me sum up. This part of PA insists on using REAL hard boiled eggs in all of their hunts. Not what I am accustomed to. Those eggs arrive at our school before noon. They seldom get "hunted" before 1:30. They don't go home until 3:30. Now I am just guessing, but something tells me they aren't even close to 45 degrees.

What did you learn this week?

This week in the cafeteria we discussed the dangers of sugary cereal and how Michelle Obama may be secrectly trying to kill us. We talked about the importance of having things firm...or soft depending on your APPLE preference, we mastered the art of fake fighting and we learned that what we think we hear might not always be the case.

This week I learned:

My co-worker's shorts look good on her bum. I thought I heard a third grader tell her this very thing, which made me laugh so very hard. Of course, when I went out to ask her what she really said..."I ate my hotdog without the bun."

Mini marshmellows are HUGE. According to the bag, Mini marshmellows are supposed to be made smaller for kids under six. Ok..um..why would a mini marshmellow be a chocking hazard? It's mini. It is hardly even a bite. You want me to make it micro?

I have been putting money down the garbarge disposal. This week some idiot bought a chicken nugget for $8,000 and I realized that the kitchen might be a bank filled with ebay gold. Behold the ASSberry. I think it'sworth at least $4,000.

Pronouce your sylables clearly. When the custodian made the microphone feedback and squeal, a second grader said it made him think that he was in a whore movie. Um...the word is HORROR. Both sylables are very important.

Enjoy your food or not...the choice is yours. At breakfast this week we had Belgium waffles with powdered sugar. A kindergartener delighted with his breakfast said "thems good". On hotdog day a different kindergartner told me that he doesn't like dill pickle spears but he loves corndogs. "That's a hotdog," I said. He dipped his head, crestfallen.

In conclusion, we learned that it's important to speak clearly, to learn to enjoy your food, to stop putting money down the garbage disposal and to make sure your bum always looks good.

What did you learn?

This week was filled with rainy weather and wound up children. Apearently those two go together like a spoon and a fork.

Here's what we learned.

It is physically impossible to supress a cough. My boss thought she could fight off her cough through kindergarten and 1st grade serving. Nope. She ended up coughing on me. Fan.freakin.tastic. At least all food and kids were spared.

Vomit continues to plague the building. We almost had a castistrophic event when a kindergarten student came within minutes of tossing his stomach contents into the milk cooler. Wow. The thought of that still makes me shudder.

Kids believe everything the art teacher says. I had to take a day off because I had a puking kid at home and the art teacher offered to help serve. Mostly she did it just so she could tell the kids the black bean empanadas had fudge in them. (insert evil laugh)

Carrots should last at least a week. We recieved produce on Tuesday including a case of 200 individually wrapped bags of baby carrots. Expiration date 3-3-12. Um..guess everyone is having carrots with their pizza.

Pancakes and jelly? We served pancakes with jelly instead of syrup this week and those kids were beside themselves. When they realized no syrup would appear some were surprised by how much they actually liked the jellied pancakes.

In conclusion, please try hard not to vomit in the milk cooler, eat your carrots before Saturday, don't believe the art teacher, everything is better with jelly and never try to hold in a cough...you're gonna hurt yourself.

What did you learn?

except with a hair net...

What did you learn this week?