Showing posts with label funny blog. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny blog. Show all posts
Saturday, May 12, 2012
Lessons from the Lunchlady: go ahead and grope me one more time...
We had a full week of school that included the dreaded grandparents day lunch.
It felt like it would never end.
Here's what I learned:
Mexicali Corn: Kids don't like bits of pepper in their corn. Nope. Nada. We served a lot more corn on Monday without the added fiesta.
Cheese sandwiches: The dreaded cheese sandwich is about to make a comeback because of the lack of lunch money. it's a problem we see at this time of the year. That being said, it doesn't make much sense to hand them out on toasted cheese day. Does it?
Make a decision: "Do you want a cheeseburger or a hamburger?" "a cheeseburger.". *places cheeseburger on tray* "I don't want cheese on it?" *tries not to roll eyes. Removes cheeseburger and places hamburger on tray. Student asks if there is cheese on it. "Um no, you just said you wanted a hamburger." "Good." *takes ten steps and drops the entire tray on the ground. New book idea: if you give a student a cheeseburger....
Grandparents Day should be renamed to grope the lunchlady day. Why do older people insist in touching me? Just put your ticket in the basket and answer the thought provoking question, "Would you like Milk or water?"
They're called disposable gloves because they're disposable. We had a substitute on Friday that thought that as long as she had gloves on her hands were clean... Um no. You can't touch your face (staph), you can't blow your nose (staph), you can't wash dishes and then serve food (gross) and you certainly cannot pull up your pants and mess with your shirt while wearing your gloves. GET A NEW PAIR!
In conclusion, I learned that making over 300 bagged lunches is exhausting, that old people are very touchy, that it's hard to decide between cheese and no cheese, that it's best to keep the peppers out of the corn and sometimes you have to point out the obvious.
What did you learn?
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Writer's Workshop: What I was blogging about this time last year.
Mama wants to know what I was blogging about last year at this time and I thought it might be fun to look back and see.
- LOST. I spent a lot of time recapping the final season of LOST and as I glance back over the pictures I remember what I loved so much about this show. I'm pretty sure it had little to do with the plot.
- THINGS NO ONE HAS EVER ASKED ME TO DO. The list included baptise their baby; cook a gourmet meal, sing at their wedding, gut a deer, change a tire, co-host the View, shingle a roof and build them some furniture. Sadly, a year later and I have yet to be asked to do any of these things.
- WEATHER. I spent a lot of time blogging about the evils of Mother Nature and what I may have done to vex her. If it wasn't snow it was pouring down rain.
- JDRF. March is the time of the year when my family gets together for a walk in support of my nephew.
- MY PEDOMETER. I loved game that my husband found for the DS. You could make your own mii and it came with a little gadget to where on your shoe or belt. Alas, I ruined it over the summer when I jumped into the pool while it was still in my pocket. I should think about getting another one.
- A DO OVER. I spoke candidly about a day in my life I'd like to do over. It was the last time I could remember having fun as a family unit. Before my parents divorced, before my sister moved too far away.
Little G said, "It's always nice to stop by and see friends before you go to battle." That still makes me smile.
What were you blogging about this time last year?
Friday, February 25, 2011
Lessons from the Lunchlady: the cafeteria can be a touchy feely sort of place
Here are just a handful of the things that I learned in the cafeteria this week.
- Doritos are nutritious. Um...okay. That's a bit of a stretch. It continues to be an enigma to me how a bag of Doritos, a cup of cheese, a cup of taco meat, some lettuce, some tomatoes and a spoonful of salsa qualifies as a reimbursable meal. I mean even if eaten with the Mexican rice and the fruit cup, it can't possibly be considered healthy.
- Heritage meals. Our tiny elementary does a number of these meals. The kids are taught facts about Fiji, Morocco, Egypt and Portugal (just to name a few) and then they are given the opportunity to try some foods from the region. Sadly, I don't think the kids like the foods much.
- Pears are a member of the rose family. Really? I mean how can that be right? Turns out they are one of the healthiest natural foods you can eat. They provide a ton of fiber and have few calories. Of course, convincing a child to try one...now that's like trying to stay dry during a thunderstorm.
- Syrup. Breakfast used to be served on Styrofoam trays (gasp) and then we were told to come up with ways to save money and we thought maybe throwing away all that stuff wasn't the most cost effective thing to do so we decided to use "real" trays. After a month of this, it can be confirmed with out much objection that children bathe their trays with syrup. We have tried to teach them to dip their pancakes or to dunk their french toast stix but alas we have learned that this is a terribly difficult task.
- Groping. Today I had on a new shirt. It has a row of smiling peas holding a flag across the front that says "Give Peas A Chance". A second grader took his hands clear across the front of those peas today, touching both my breasts along the way. "What are those?" he asked, innocently(??) "Peas," I said, pulling his hand away, "and let's ask without touching next time."
What did you learn this week?
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About Me
- kisatrtle
- I'm a 41 year old (gasp) freelance writer, school cafeteria manager, wife and mother. I have three children and one anxious and overweight beagle. I use my blog to make others laugh, to share some cool crafts, to document my lunchlady adventures and to lament about the challenges faced by us all on the journey called life. Thanks for visiting. Please leave some crack...um...I meant some comments.
