Showing posts with label lunch lessons. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lunch lessons. Show all posts
Friday, April 27, 2012
Lessons from the Lunchlady: Have you checked your congenitals?
Holy Crap! I learned a lot this week and I only worked three days! Imagine the wealth of knowledge I would be able to share with you if I actually worked five days!
Go get the alcohol. Clearly this means something totally different to me than it does to my boss. She meant the alcohol wipes we use to clean our thermometers. I thought she had a secret stash I wasn't aware of.
If you're in your 90s chances are you won't die of congenital heart failure. Ever have one of those words that just doesn't sound right. I was trying to relay how my grandma's brother passed away and when I said congenital it sounded so wrong. My co-workers laughed and corrected me. They said congestive. They mocked me most of the day about my congenitals, but I was still convinced that it was a real word. Those to just wouldn't be swayed until our Dr. Principal concurred. She must feel like a genius when she eats with us.
Kids have no idea what chili is. We had chili this week and a lot of our kids were thrown for a loop. One exceptionally articulate kindergartner nearly started to cry, insisting that he didn't order soup that he ordered hot lunch. When I offered to (gasp) change his lunch to PB&J or a turkey sandwich his response, "I do so like turkey sandwiches."
Keep the hot water in the pan. I managed to spill very hot water down the front of my pants. It involved pulling slotted pans from a steamer and not realizing just how much water was still in there. This incident prompted two things: an immediate visit to the bathroom to apply burn cream and the idea for a line of injured-at-work greeting cards. "Heard you got all hot and bothered at work this week."
Everyone looks the same from behind. Ok...not everyone. We were all sitting down to lunch when a teacher from another building hollered to us, "Have you seen Dr. Principal?". Um...no...oh wait. She's just sitting right here beside me. The teacher's response, "Oh, I didn't realize. You look just like everyone else, I mean, well, not that, um...can I talk to you for a minute."
Wait...are you saying lunch ladies look a certain way?
Say no to crack. The last thing I learned this week was be careful just how low the rise of your pants falls. There is a lot of bending in this job and your co-workers might not want to see your ass crack.
This last one sort of proves that there is a certain look to lunch ladies, doesn't it?
What did you learn this week?
Friday, March 30, 2012
Lessons from the Lunchlady: four times four is sixteen
This week was a short week as I had Monday off to allow for my brain to grow at ServSafe. Actually they didn't close school just to allow my brain to grow. Teachers were preparing report cards.
Here's what I learned.
We need to put pierogies on the menu more often. Raise your hand if you know what a pierogie is. A lot of our kiddos hadn't a clue and listening to five year olds try to pronounce it was fantastic. We had tacorogies, and rogies, pie-ogies and rearogies. It was delightful!
Here's what I learned.
We need to put pierogies on the menu more often. Raise your hand if you know what a pierogie is. A lot of our kiddos hadn't a clue and listening to five year olds try to pronounce it was fantastic. We had tacorogies, and rogies, pie-ogies and rearogies. It was delightful!
I haven't outgrown my LD in math. This might surprise all of you but I like to joke around. I am seldom serious. Serious people kind of annoy me. That being said, when I took a taped sign down in the cafeteria this week and pulled paint off of the number one I told the custodian that I messed up the number 416. Much to my surprise our gymnasium is not covered with random weird numbers like I assumed. They are apparently some kind of math idiom. After all, didn't I realize that 4x4 is sixteen and that the window directly across from it in the gym had 16 windows....um seriously? I'm not confident I could pass the 3rd grade math PSSA but we'll talk more about my LD next week in a post that I promise will not be serious.
Pizza on Thursday? Some students were very concerned that we perhaps cooked the wrong items this week as we always have pizza on Friday. I am often amazed by what kids will notice and by what they seem oblivious to..like that giant booger about to fall out on the serving line.
Mega Million Mania. We decided to play the lottery because 500 million is too amazing to ignore. The four of us (three lunchladies and the custodian) decided to buy 10 tickets and then our principal wanted in. She is an honorary member of the lunch bunch because she pretty much eats with us everyday, but when she threw a five dollar bill in my boss about lost it...demanding that she be given $2.50 back! "She can't have anymore millions than us" LOL. We agreed that 1/5 of 500 million was definitely enough.
Just don't give him a coat. I have talked about our custodian many times. He cleans up vomit, fixes sinks, refills paper towels and is a fly assassin . Today, however, when a kindergarten kid gave him a multi-layered jacket with many of the sleeves inside out he was stumped. After trying for at least five minutes all while the five year old stared on our fly assassin had to ask for help.
In conclusion, keep your coat on, don't pay more than your share, enjoy your pizza even if it's Thursday, order the rogies and remember that four times four is sixteen!
What did you learn?
Pizza on Thursday? Some students were very concerned that we perhaps cooked the wrong items this week as we always have pizza on Friday. I am often amazed by what kids will notice and by what they seem oblivious to..like that giant booger about to fall out on the serving line.
Mega Million Mania. We decided to play the lottery because 500 million is too amazing to ignore. The four of us (three lunchladies and the custodian) decided to buy 10 tickets and then our principal wanted in. She is an honorary member of the lunch bunch because she pretty much eats with us everyday, but when she threw a five dollar bill in my boss about lost it...demanding that she be given $2.50 back! "She can't have anymore millions than us" LOL. We agreed that 1/5 of 500 million was definitely enough.
Just don't give him a coat. I have talked about our custodian many times. He cleans up vomit, fixes sinks, refills paper towels and is a fly assassin . Today, however, when a kindergarten kid gave him a multi-layered jacket with many of the sleeves inside out he was stumped. After trying for at least five minutes all while the five year old stared on our fly assassin had to ask for help.
In conclusion, keep your coat on, don't pay more than your share, enjoy your pizza even if it's Thursday, order the rogies and remember that four times four is sixteen!
What did you learn?
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About Me
- kisatrtle
- I'm a 41 year old (gasp) freelance writer, school cafeteria manager, wife and mother. I have three children and one anxious and overweight beagle. I use my blog to make others laugh, to share some cool crafts, to document my lunchlady adventures and to lament about the challenges faced by us all on the journey called life. Thanks for visiting. Please leave some crack...um...I meant some comments.
