I recently heard the term facebragging and thought "AYFKM?"

Is this really something we should label? After careful thought and a quick scan through my own newsfeed, I reconsidered.

Facebragging is an epidemic and we need to stop it before we all turn into Molly Parker. She takes facebragging to whole new level.

Let's make a pact to end this nonsence.

We all know you're proud of your kid's grades. You don't have to post it. You might be surprised to learn this but we are ALL proud of our kids EVEN WHEN THEIR GRADES AREN'T PERFECT.

There is no such thing as a perfect life. Stop pretending yours is.

Someone should have told you a while ago that people respond better to people who keep it real.

I don't want to see pictures of your child carrying his potty chair filled with urine. Most kids figure out this skill or else their prom date brings them home A LOT earlier than agreed upon.

Facebragging works the other way too. Stop writing things like, "Will anyone miss me when I'm gone?" That's a baiting status. You are trolling for comments reassuring your worth. If you need to do this, you really should consider paying for therapy.

I guess, like me, you are wondering what isn't considered facebragging. I can hear you in the distance faintly saying, "Just what then can I post about? If you don't want to know about my perfect SAT score or the successful removal of my gall bladder at home by me, then I just don't know what to type."

Here's what I know about that.

You shouldn't post anything that includes words 'scary', 'spooky', 'haunted', 'forbidden' or 'hydroponic'. (Bonus points if you can guess that movie reference.)

Basically, just keep right on posting as if you'd never heard the term facebragging and I'll keep on blocking you.

It's either that or I'll be forced to copy your status word for word and post it as my own, tagging you in it.

My status today: I'm so proud of myself for ridding the world completely of facebragging. It's hard to be as awesome as me.