Yesterday it became official. I won the Parent of the Year award. I know, I know, you are jealous. You can't believe that I won.

Maybe you were also in the running, but it is clear, based on this awesome graphic, that I am the winner.

Here are a few reasons why the judges clearly had no other choice but yours truly.


~Yesterday Oldest G told me she hated me before 9 a.m. This, in and of itself, is a record.

~All of my kids were bored before 8:30 a.m.

~I took the kids to the pool and they were still bored.

~Little G. jumped in, swam for 10, minutes and returned to my chair crying like someone whacked him with a wet noodle.

~His ear hurt.

~I figured he had water in it. It seemed like a logically conclusion.

~After having him lay on a blanket, shake like a dog and tug on his ear, it didn't get better.

~Oldest, Little G and I left the pool. Middle G. stayed there with a friend.

~We went to the store and bought some Swim Ear. It didn't help.

~I called the doctor. Took him in at 3:45 and found out that he had a raging ear infection. "Sticking his head in water was probably very painful," said by the doctor while she was trying to ascertain if I was slow.

Is "He was bored" a good excuse for this? In my defense he never had a fever and barely had any cold symptoms.

Newton's law of motherhood...."If they can make you look like an ass they will."