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Friday, August 14, 2009

Friday High Five: Five strange things I heard this week

Today we will be discussing strange things we have heard this week and odd conversations we have had. Here are my top five:

  • I noticed I had a large amount of charges on my credit card this month and I thought, "That can't be right." Sure enough I was charge for a hotel reservation that I cancelled. Great. I called the hotel. They said, "Oh your name was spelled wrong." Seriously. You spelled my name wrong but still managed to bill my card for a room I never checked into. Incredulous. They are crediting it and it should appear within five business days. Unless they give the credit to the person's who name appears on the bill. Lesson learned: Check your credit card statement.
  • After telling my doctor I couldn't sleep, he responded with "Are you depressed?" No. I'm. Tired. Isn't that what I just said? Lesson learned: Repeat everything you say to your doctor at least six times.
  • Cashier at Walmart asked me: What are you going to make with those AV-E-ODD-Os? Are you serious? They are called avocados. I'm making guacamole. The oddest thing about this...I had this very conversation at a different Walmart a few months ago. Lesson Learned: Cashiers at Walmart don't eat avocados.
  • On the phone with dog groomer: Dog Groomer: "Has he ever had his toenails clipped?" Me: "No"; Dog Groomer: "What did he do when you tried to cut them?"; me: "yelped." Dog Groomer: "I don't stop if he yelps. I just keep going. I have stuff here to stop the bleeding." Lesson learned: Find the a different groomer.
  • Oddest conversation of the week: At the dog park some guy walks up to me and says "Are you interested in any bull dicks? I have them in extra large, large and small." Me: "What?" Odd guy: "Yeah I can get them in any size you want. Dogs really like them but they kind of smell. They're actual bull penises. I'd only let him have them outside." Me: "No thank you." Lesson learned: You just never know who might show up at the dog park.

What is the oddest conversation you had this week?

7 random thoughts:

Diane said...

Just found you. You have much odder conversations than I do. Wow.... good call on the last one!

InkHearts said...

Are you kidding me?!?!?!?!? He actually said,"Excuse me, are you interested in any bull dicks?" The man that asks me that better be a cattle breeder and I better have a cow right next to me when he says it or he might need one himself to replace the one I do some damage to! What a loser! Geez! It is like those plastic truck "balls" we see here in Texas, hanging off the tow hitches...some people have WAY too much time on their hands.....


Crystal said...

WOW! You have had a rough week! I am constantly amazed at what people will ask/tell/say to a perfect stranger!

Angela said...

That is hilarious!! They are actually called bully sticks and dogs do love them although most owners stop that love once they realize what they are!! BUT SERIOUSLY who walks up to someone to ask if they want some bull dick!! That is freaking hilarious! I am at the library using the computer and was holding in my laughter at your post until the last conversation when I no longer held it in!!

septembermom said...

That is one bunch of odd conversations. The dog park conversation sounds like good material for a sitcom scene:)

Jean said...

Those are hysterical. I can't believe you had two different people say aveodos. LOL I thought you were copying an older conversation for the sake of filler. LOL Say, I might be interested in some bull dicks. ROTFLMAO That's great! Only you.

Jenners said...

Well, those are weird but tres amusing!!! thanks for sharing.

And I have a bone to pick with you. Every since I read your insomnia post, I'VE had trouble sleeping. I'm taking the OTC stuff now to help me out ... I blame you. I caught it from your blog.

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I'm a 41 year old (gasp) freelance writer, school cafeteria manager, wife and mother. I have three children and one anxious and overweight beagle. I use my blog to make others laugh, to share some cool crafts, to document my lunchlady adventures and to lament about the challenges faced by us all on the journey called life. Thanks for visiting. Please leave some meant some comments.
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