I can't sleep.

I fall asleep, but then I wake up.

I thought it was because my kids come into my room and can't sleep alone. I thought it was because I enjoy caffeine. I thought I would sleep like a hibernating bear this child free week.

Guess what? I didn't.

So I rushed to the ER. Just kidding. Who does that? I made a doctor's appointment for Tuesday and it went a little bit like this.

me: "I'm tired, I can't sleep. I'm irritable. I yell at my kids a lot about stupid stuff. I feel angry. I don't know if I'm irritable because I'm tired, or if I'm tired because I'm irritable.

doc: "Oh, sort of like the chicken and the egg. Do you think you are depressed?"

me: "No not really, just not sleeping. I haven't slept through the night in over six months."

doc: "What happened six months ago?"

me: "Nothing out of the ordinary. Like I said I'm not sure why I feel this way."

doc: "Have you considered talking to a therapist?"

me: "Does having mango margaritas with your girlfriends count as therapy?"

doc: "I can give you some medication to help with the mood swings, but that won't resolve the underlying issue as to WHY you are not sleeping. You should consider talking about it with someone?"

Does this mean that I'm officially crazy and that I'm going to have to have a shrink tell me that? I started the medicine he gave me and it is making my insomnia worse.

It is 1 a.m. here and I am typing a blog post. I fell asleep for two hours and woke up with dry mouth so annoying it felt like I'd recently downed a bottle of tequila. I checked the tequila and it is still here. LOL

I'm thinking about chucking this anti-depressants and trying some good old fashioned sleepy time tea.

If that doesn't work anyone want to volunteer to offer the same help Goofy received in the video above? It looks like it hurts initially, but then you at least get some rest.