This week we learn that our poor Prince Charming has yet another name. 

Seriously?

In Fairytale Land

It appears that our dashing prince is unstopable.  He galantly defeats an evil ugly brute and is rewarded by King Midas.  His father (Charles Widmore from LOST) is beaming with pride when Midas turns Charming's sword to gold and promises even more once he defeats the dragon.

Thankfully Midas back at the castle by the time the evil-ugly brute, whose death has been greatly exaggerated, RUNS CHARMING THROUGH WITH AN EVIL-UGLY SPEAR.

I did not see that coming.


Enter Rumple.

Dude...this guy is everywhere and Robert Carlyle continues to impress me with his acting skills.

He tells King "Widmore" that dead is dead ( a great LOST reference).  Then he reveals that James has a twin brother.  Turns out Rumple's fetish for fetching babies isn't just reserved for maid servants named Cinderella.  He works for royalty, too.

This is when we flash to our sweet Shepard boy (his name is not revealed, but one can hope that it is David)

Turns out ma and paw were trying to save the farm.  Ever notice how expensive it is to run a farm?  Apparently, it is sooo expensive that Ma is willing to give up one of her baby boys to keep the farm a float for a short while.  Um...seems a little far fetched.  I mean, if you're gonna give up one of the twins at least get enough money to be set for life.

But alas, Ma didn't think that far ahead and now Paw is dead and she is trying to marry Charming off to some chick with a big set of .... dowries.

Until Rumple entices him with a proposition.  You slay the dragon.  Your family lives comfortably.  Personally, I'd get that in writing.  It didn't work out very well last time.

Charming agrees.  First mistake.  Then the cute farm boy actually succeeds in slaying the worst CG dragon I have ever seen.  Made me miss the black smoke from LOST.

Midas is overjoyed with his new mantle piece and King "Widmore" is anxious to be reward.  Of course there is always a catch.

This one has a name.  Abigail.



Abigal announces that "He'll do" and I begin to wonder why she is so dislikable in fairytale land while I don't mind her much in Storybrook.

Charming shares a Lifetime moment with his ma (who he is apparently harboring no resentment at all towards...curious) and then heads off into the sunset with his new bitch bride.  Off to meet Snow.

I thought it was a nice touch that in this episode, Charming had no scar on his chin.

Meanwhile back in Storybrook.


Mary Margaret is mopping about  Charming.  Turns out David is home and Kathryn is tired of him giving her googly eyes.

David leaves his own welcome home party to chase after Mary and remind her that he feels so much more for her than he does Kathryn.

He pulls out the all time worst married guy line of all time saying that she doesn't mean anything to him and that he is drawn to her.  "She needs someone to feel about her the way I feel about you."  Seriously?

As much as I want him to choose already I'm having a little trouble feeling bad for him.  He has all the cards.

Mary wrestles with her feelings and talks to Emma about it who pours her a drink and says, "If you think something you want to do is wrong, it usually is."

Seems like there is a lot of random drinking and newspaper reading in this episode. Go ahead...watch it again.  You know you wanna.

David decides to leave Kathryn and we all cheer.  He asks Snow to meet him at the Toll Bridge.  To which, Emma encourages her to go.  She throws caution to the wind and goes.

Like the village idiot, David asks for directions from Regina.  Okay...this is too much.  Does he really think that she is going to tell him how to get to the bridge.

Regina leads him to Rumple.  Why?  No one knows.

David walks into Gold's shop and fiddles with the glass mobile that used to grace Emma's crib.  He hollers out to see if anyone is there.  He walks past those creepy dolls from last weeks episode.  "Charming," Gold says.  Clever.

David does not get the reference.  Gold give him directions to the bridge but as David turns to leave he is entranced by a windmill.  We think he remembers his life with Snow.  His farm.  His Ma.  But no.  He has remembered his fake life with Kathryn.

He goes to the bridge but not to confess his dying love, but to tell Mary that he is returning to Kathryn.  Wrong choice.

Mary is upset and alone.  A bad combination.





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